Monday, January 2, 2017

Resolution

So many resolutions are being joked about and passed around like when people make decisions, nothing ever really changes. Sure people's minds can change. Things can happen to weaken that resolve. But what is resolve? What does it mean to have a resolution?

Being the true nerd that I am - I looked up definitions and tried to make sense of this anomaly. Resolution is defined as "a firm decision to do or not do something; the action of solving a problem, dispute or contentious matter." Okay so making the decision to do something can be the easy part. Sometimes sitting with friends there is that moment something is being discussed, everyone says 'Let's do it! Together!' Then everyone agrees and then...nothing happens? Why? The group resolution was strong! But the group didn't set any steps or short term goals to get there. No date was set on when to go. No training for the adventure. No one took responsibility and began preparations. Not one thought until the suggested time frame had come and gone. So does that same idea work with our personal resolutions? Probably.

In the height of my years of substance misuse and abuse I made a *strong* resolution every night to not use the next day. I still used the next day. I fell again and again. It wasn't until I met with some people experienced in recovery and what comes after making a decision or "resolution." We spent weeks together learning the importance of acting after a decision is made and challenging thoughts that are contrary to the initial decision. Also, this included learning to make plans, readjust other plans and keep a fluid mindset to the whole process. This kept me from holding onto any ideas of outcomes and accepting what happened as a result of my choices. If I didn't make the intended resolution - what happened? How did I need to readjust my plans and steps for the next day

So in terms of resolutions for the New Year - MAKE THEM. Get excited by them! Show your passions in new and exciting ways! Remember to set specific steps to help you reach what you decided to do. Make plans A-ZZZ and be okay with your plan changing along the way. Relax expectations and let each day flow as you grow. You change, why can't your plan change with you.

So moving into 2017 I am choosing to set a resolution for self-care. It will look different each and every day. There will be different destinations: health, emotional security, spiritual destinations, service, trips... Here is to a year of taking action to meet a resolution and staying fluid enough to see it through.

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